Health Care Reform is Killing Me

I hate to talk politics. I hate getting those slamming chain emails that bash one side or the other full of bullshit statements that have very little or no validity(those of you who send them, please stop). I hate that as a tax paying American, my voice is not heard at all. I voted to elect people who I think can make a change; and in turn it's just more of the same.

I don't get the whole problem with passing health care reform. OK, I'll be the first to admit I am dense when it comes to politics. I followed the last election, I watched all the debates, I actually liked and voted for my choice. But all I hear is rhetoric. "Political posturing" seems to be the key phrase. Nothing is getting accomplished. Each side is hell-bent on making sure the other side doesn't win. In the end, none of us wins.

Me, as a middle-class person is getting screwed. My health insurance premiums went up AGAIN! UGH. I can't take it anymore. I literally will not be able to afford one more increase. After a year of reduced pay and benefits, the premiums are wiping out my savings. If my deductible increases anymore what will the point be of even having insurance. I may as well take my chances and bank the cash.

For God's sake I have a $5000 deductible. I can't afford to go and get a mammogram, because I can't afford the extra out of pocket expense. God forbid I get bronchitis or have to be hospitalized. This is just ridiculous that I spend over $6000/year and can't even go to the doctor when I need to. Something is wrong with our system, big time!

OK, I don't want the Government running my life either, but nor do I want the Insurance companies to take over my health care. I want a choice if I can go to a Naturalpath or a GP. If I get the flu I want it to be covered under my ridiculous premiums I've already paid. I should get to have some care for all the money I pay out. I want preventative maintenance, like an annual MRI to detect anything brewing within, a Mamogram, PAP/Prostate and Heart and Colon checks.

I figured it out, in the last seven years I have paid out well over $50,000 in premiums/payments. I have been to the Doctor less then 10 times. At $5,000 a visit, I think I am the only one getting screwed, seems like the Docs and Insurance companies are doing just fine.

What do we have to do as citizens to get congress to stop all this bullshit and get some policies passed. Why does every bill have to be so damn detailed that they argue about it for months. Why can't they write and pass simple legislation. Just take one step at a time. First and foremost on the insurance forefront would be to limit premium hikes. To put a cap on what the insurance companies can charge. So now they pass this bill and instead of working with it now all the Republicans have to waste more of our tax payer money to fight the decision. God, when does it ever stop?!

And we, as American citizens are getting screwed. I guess it's just politics as usual, no big change---the rich get richer, the middle class pays for everything and the little guy gets squished.

I'd like to strip the politicians of all their benefits. Take away so much of their income that they have to live like the poor, and middle-income poor that they are creating. I'd like to see them struggle to make ends meet every month. To worry and stress so much about losing their job and not being able to find a new one that they end up in the ER with chest pain. I'd like to see them get screwed time and time again by large corporations who suck the life out of the people they supposedly serve. I'd like to see them go into foreclosure, fight and argue with banks and lose everything they have ever worked for because some arrogant SOB in congress is more worried about their political party winning then actually working for the people who elected them.

I bet things would change then.

Do it for the Chickens

Ok, most of my blogging life has been pretty politically correct. I haven't gone off on any real tangents or complained too much about politics, war, health care or anything else I feel is beyond my control.

But today I would like to discuss the movement of Organic vs. Conventionally produced products. I have become a naturalist, well about 80% natural anyway, and every day I learn more and more about just how bad conventionally produced products are.

Today, my case in point is about eggs. I buy organic eggs because I don't believe that chickens should be fed hormones. I suffer with a major hormonal imbalance and I figure that I just don’t need anything else messing me up. But I guess I really didn't realize the real difference in organic eggs vs. conventional eggs.

Did you know that organic eggs have 22% more Omega 3's in them then conventional eggs? That is a staggering difference. And if that isn't worth the extra $1.50, then read on.

Conventional chickens are kept in tiny cages. Most cages are less then 2 sq ft and they share that cage with up to 9 other chickens. There is not enough room for them to stretch and spread their wings. The cage conditions are dirty, crowded and unhealthy to say the least. Most of them live less then 2 years. They are force-fed hormone-laden corn feed, which by the way, is not what a chicken would actually eat if they had the choice. Their beaks are cut off. They are never allowed to roam freely and hunt and peck as a chicken does, they never see the light of day. Then, when they have served their egg-bearing purpose they are slaughtered and the meat is used to feed us. And that's the meat you get in 80% of the restaurants and grocers in the country. There are dozens of other reasons not to buy conventional chicken and eggs that you can read here, for me, it's too gross to post. http://www.assatashakur.org/forum/afrikan-wholistic-health/14393-chicken-unhealthy-white-meat.html

Organic chickens by contrast, especially free-range chickens, are allowed to roam. They get exercise, fresh air and sunlight. They can eat worms and bugs, seeds and greens – anything their little chicken heart desires. And in being able to live the life of a normal chicken they develop much more Omega 3's, protein, vitamins, enzymes and other nutrients. They develop muscle and strong bones and lead happy little chicken lives.

I admit, over the years I have sort of buried my head when it came to "industrial farming". I know in the back of my head how truly disgusting the practices are. But because I like protein, I have not completely acknowledged that disturbing fact. I just don't want to know. But in my quest for better health I have to look at the whole food process, I need to know the realities.

If the chickens are being fed all that junk and we eat their eggs and meat then it stands to reason we are also being fed all that junk. That just makes me sick. No wonder we have so many health issues in our country.

The old saying, "you are what you eat" really applies. If you want to ingest chemicals, eat today's conventional produce, meat and dairy. If not, buy organic. And if you won't do it for yourself, then do it for the chickens, they have no choice.

Adopting Creativity

A fellow writer just posed the idea to me that a creative person needs to adopt creativity as though it were a child. You need to nurture it, spend time with it, teach it, and grow it...I had never thought of it like that before, but it is profoundly accurate.

I get people all the time that say, “oh, you are so creative...I wish I could do that”. And I always think, “You can, you just have to try. Take a class, expand your mind...”. Lord knows I’m no Da Vinci, but creativity sort of comes second nature to me I guess. It’s like breathing or sleeping...it’s just something I need to do every day. It’s part of the essence that is my being. But it wasn’t always that way. It’s come and gone throughout my life. I wasn’t born with it.

I wasn’t born knowing how to paint, I can’t draw people or animals to save my soul and I for sure can’t sing. But I have a fire within that keeps me questing after more. I have the ability to visualize. I have a need for knowledge.

I’ve taken many, many writing classes and painting classes and courses on interior design and color analysis. I’ve trained on software programs for graphic arts and computer design and learned from other artists and mentors in my field. When people have asked me to design a piece of jewelry for them that they have seen in a magazine, I may not know how to readily do it, but I’m willing to learn. Of course there’s something there that I was born with--a flair, a knack, an instinct maybe. But I have spent a lot of time developing my creativity too.

And sometimes creativity comes to you at odd times. Last weekend a book idea came to me in my dreams, I dreamt the plot, the murder, the romance, the setting and personalities of my characters. When I woke at 5am I had to write it all down before I forgot it. Within a few hours I had 6 pages of premise together and a rough outline of the characters. I’ve never written a novel before, but what the hell, I’m willing to give it a shot. And I’ll go take some classes to learn a few tricks of the trade – maybe something comes of it, maybe it doesn’t; but the experience is still worth having.

I had an idea for a jewelry design hit me so hard one afternoon, I feverishly filled pages of notes and ideas. Sketches, materials, and the name, its marketability –all of it just hit me like a sack of potatoes. When that happens you just can’t ignore it, you have to run with it when you can. I figure that idea came to me so strongly for a reason, it’s up to me to figure out why.

I’ve written poems, laid out a landscape plan for my garden, and redesigned a room all in my head while driving to work. If it comes to you it’s a gift and must be acted upon. Just like a child that is crying or sick, creativity needs immediate attention. And that person was right, it must be nurtured with classes and mentors. It must be given room to grow. You must spend time with it, answer any questions it has or learn from its mistakes. It’s a comittment that must be honored and respected throughout its lifetime.

So yes, I guess you could say I adopted creativity, I am committed to it. And I will follow its journey.

What Inspires Me?

In my writing class we talk about the ups and downs of blogging, of writing, and of writers block. We are often given "free-writes" with topics to inspire writing off the cuff.

This last week we were given examples of "successful" bloggers. These success stories supposedly gave us numerous ideas for improving our blogs. After reading them I was not inspired, in fact, I was pretty irritated. These blogs were perfect examples about what I hate about the blogosphere. They were trite, repetitive, link-happy reiterations of the vast nothingness that people talk about. Not to mention they were vulgar, uninteresting and irresponsible...and in my opionion, the writing wasn't worth reading either.

Someone once said to me, "if the blogger wasn't famous then reading their blog was just a waste of time". Ouch, that kind of hurt. I'd like to think that the time I spend on my blog is not a waste of time. And hopefully not a waste of my readers' time either. I'm trying to write with substance and meaning. I attempt to work through issues that I know a lot of people share. I'm trying to look for hope and inspiration in an often uninspirational world. Is that not a worthy way to spend my free time?

So anyway, my instructor posed the question: "What inspires you?" So here is my reply:

Ok, I know it sounds hoky, but Love inspires me. Giving inspires me. Positive thinking and hope for a better world inspires me.

And conversely, stress and anger and angst inspire me too. Usually when I'm at a really low place, the words I find are a mechanism for change. Changing my attitude or my outlook or my game plan. Sometimes I have to just sit down and write it out or I swear I will lose it.

And sometimes I have to cry.

One day last fall I cried the entire day. I was so stressed out, so pissed off and saturated from my day that all I had left in me was the urge to write. I just sat down, looked at the blank screen, and effortlessly the thoughts flowed into my fingers and onto the page without my brain as an interface. When I was done, the tears finally stopped.

It was raw, it was real and it was one of the most honest posts I have made. It also got the most feedback.

You see I connected with others who have been there. And that notion that I was going through what so many other's out there have been through in this last year inspired me to keep going. I don't think that is a waste of time.

I think that reaching out to anyone, even if it's only one person, is worthwhile.

And that, is probably the most inspiring thing of all.

Giving from the Heart

It's my day off. I love my Friday off. I get to leisurely rise, drink coffee, read, write or whatever…and it's all on my time schedule.

This morning I'm watching Ellen. I love that she's a generous person who invites real people on her show to tell their story. I know that it's not her money she's giving away. And yes, maybe she gets good press, but still, Ellen makes it happen for people.

I'm watching and she has on the gal, Angela Martin, from American Idol who did not make the top 24. She's a great singer and she's had a really tough life. This girl could use a break. I first saw her three years ago when she made the Hollywood week, her Father was killed the day she got there. She has a daughter with a disability. Last year she made Idol but couldn't stay because she had to go to jail because she couldn't afford to pay a ticket. Now this year, for some reason she didn't make the top 24 either. Poor girl, if anyone could use a break, she could. Personally I thought she was better then a couple girls they let through.

So Ellen is talking to her, letting her share her story and then she sings. She has a great, powerful voice, and an astounding positive disposition considering her angst. After she sings Ellen announces that Kara Dioguardi, her fellow Idol judge, is writing and producing a song for this gal and they intend to help her get a record label contract.

The girl just grabbed Ellen and hugged her as hard as she could. I just cried. It's kind of like when you cry after Extreme Home Makeover. The sheer kindness that is shown to someone in need just moves me to tears.

Deep down I wish that someone in my lifetime would voluntarily show me that kind of kindness with no strings attached. But even more so, I wish that I could help someone like that. I wish I had the means to change someone's life.

But maybe we all have the means. Maybe it's not just about money. Maybe it's just about giving of your self, freely and unconditionally. Maybe as long as it comes from your heart it doesn't matter what you do to help someone else.

We can all do this. Whether it's holding a door for the elderly. Delivering Meals on Wheels, or spending time playing Scrabble with someone who's all-alone in the world. We have the power within ourselves to change other people's lives.

So my question is, will you?

Never too old...

A few years ago I had a semi-argument with a friend. She had suggested I go back to school to get additional training. I'd been bitching about my job for awhile, wanting to make a change - but mostly not knowing what I wanted to do.

At that point in my life practically every single thing that was going on felt negative. My health was tanking. My relationship with my girls was stressed. I was always strapped for cash, paying my bills fine but never any left over. I couldn't seem to get motivated for anything.

I shut down.

I shut myself down from trying anything new. I shut out any ideas or suggestions for change. I quit going to parties - I didn't want to see anyone - I had nothing good to say.

I knew I needed to do something drastic. But I felt I had neither the money, the time nor the ambition to give it a go. I felt like a failure.

The more suggestions people had for improvement, the more excuses I found not to change.

What a difference a few years can make.

Since starting my blog about 8 months ago, I have had a renaissance. Some how purging my frustrations in life in ink so to speak has brought me to solutions. I'm sure there is psychological answer for the phenomenon of which I don't know.

Since January I have signed up for 5 classes. And I'm very excited for each and every one. No, I'm not going back to college to finish my degree, I'm just enriching my life and learning new things. It's got me so electrified I feel buzzed.

The first of which is a writing class. I love writing classes. In school all of my electives were writing classes. There just is no better way for me to get to the core of my emotions then with pen and ink. Then there's a photoshop class, a digital photography class, a marketing class, a blog class, a book-making class....I want to take more.

It seems like the one thing I had been denying myself is the one thing that has set me free....what is yours?

State of the Blog

When I started this blog it was meant to be an outlet for my frustrations and for my ponderings, a way to find conflict resolution. It was a way to self-discovery and personal growth. I wanted to evolve. And it has done all those things for me.

As for my readers, I'm not sure.

I get a fair amount of positive feedback, people find me inspiring. Maybe I bring a tear to their eye. They can relate. I guess that was my intention to begin with, to touch people on a personal level.

I wanted to write about life's challenges. I wanted to explore how I resolve the daily conflicts that we all in our human race of life endure. And I hope that's what I've been doing.

No matter what our profession, we all face struggles, self-doubt and worry. We all wonder if we did the right thing, or if we are being true to ourselves. And we all share hope and wonder and success. We all have wrenches thrown into our daily lives too.

Writing has always been my vent. As a child if I had an argument with my Dad, I would write it out. I'd scribble down all my objections. I'd read them back loudly in my head and when I got it all out of me, I'd tear it up. With those torn pages, my anger seemed to dissipate.

Now in this stage of my life I'm looking to writing again as a way to change my occupation. For years I've been looking for a change, but as it seems no one wants to let you switch gears because you "know you can do the job, or "because it's your heart's desire", or even "because it's something you always thought you would be good at". No, they want to hire an expert in their field. They don't want to take a chance. And in this competitive market, who can blame them.

So I've decided to become a writer, hopefully professionally. I figure if no one else wants to give me a shot, I'll make it happen for myself. I'm hoping some day people will care what I have to say. That I will be a modern day Irma Bombeck and bring humor and truth to our human condition.

Hopefully then people won't think that my blog is a waste of time.